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Empowered Women, Empower Women | Raw Parenthood

By 18th July 2018 41 Comments

Raw Parenthood

Entering motherhood is like entering into a worldwide support group –  it should make us feel we are a part of something bigger; reassured that, as we experience the highs and lows of motherhood, we do not experience them alone… So why do so many of us feel so lonely and unsupported?

Motherhood has become just another way to seek validation and compete with others, all the while feeling more and more like we are failing at this; like we are the only ones who don’t have it together; like we are never good enough, no matter how many things we tick off our list… We feel this way, and we go online to only have it confirmed, because the people we know have plastered happy, smiling children with happy, smiling parents all over their profiles.
Meanwhile, we are filled with anxiety every time we need to leave the house, because what if our kid throws a screaming fit in the middle of Tesco? What if they run into the road? Why does it have to take us four hours to even get out the house, anyway?! How come all you ever see is well-put-together children walking so well alongside their well-put-together parents, yet mine tries to pull me in the opposite direction whenever we need to be somewhere?… So you stay indoors, but you can’t quite bring yourself to stop scrolling your feed for confirmation that you are the only one struggling.

You are not the only one struggling, mama.
You are not the only one buckling under the weight of trying to balance everything.
You are not the only one questioning every little thing you do/don’t do, say and think.
You are not the only one who sometimes wishes she could just run away from it all and then feeling guilty about it.
So can we stop with the façade, please?

Here’s the challenge:

Don’t be afraid to show the world the reality of parenthood: it’s HARD, it’s messy, it’s beautiful and intertwined with grace, joy, tears of sadness and moments of sheer frustration. We all know it, yet we rarely see it. The more we get used to seeing the realities of parenthood across our social media, the less stigma and judgements will be attached to sharing our realities.
It takes a great level of courage to be so vulnerable… No one minds seeing your kids looking like cute little angels, or hearing how he or she achieved star of the week! Who wants to hear about the hard day you’ve had, or how many tantrums your kid threw between the front door and corner shop? You’ll assume no one… But fellow mama’s NEED IT. You have no idea how many mothers on your friends’ list are having a really hard day/week, thanks to the rollercoaster that is parenthood, and how much they just need to see they’re not alone, instead of seeing nothing but people’s highlight reels.

There is an empowerment to be found in being real, honest and vulnerable.

It is scary – there will always be someone waiting in the wings to judge you – but something has to change, otherwise, we are only going to see a continuous rise in depression, anxiety and negative coping mechanisms amongst mothers.
The change starts with each of us being honest about what our journey of parenthood looks like.

Be the mother who doesn’t have to cram the kids into the corner of the room to take a picture, because its the only part that’s tidy. Be the mother who admits the day was full of tears and tantrums, bribes and loss of temper.
Be the mother who doesn’t put on a front or glosses over the truth, when someone asks how your weeks going.
Be the mother that admits your child is struggling, because it’s OKAY.
Be the mother who, when confronted with someone else’s reality, does not judge, condemn or ignore… But empathises, encourages and uplifts.

It’s okay that your house gets messy again the second you finish cleaning, so you don’t clean as much as you ‘should’.
It’s okay that you let your kid eat chocolate before tea because it was the only way to stop the tantrum that was risking you burning the food.

It’s okay to admit you’re tired, you’re fed up, you want a break, you’re sick of feeling like you give and give and never get much back… You still love your kids with everything you have, we know – struggling, and admitting that, does not automatically mean you are lacking in love for your children. You don’t need to always start with, “I love my kids, but…” Or end with, “but I love them so much”… Love will always be the firm foundation that motherhood is built upon; unchanging with the ups and downs.

Mama, be empowered today to be REAL with those you know and see the empowerment of others unfold.
When we enter into motherhood, we enter into a group; we are no longer alone in our journey. Let it be widely known to be a group of women who uplifts, encourages and empowers it’s own. ??

If you would like to read more articles like this head over to Jerrys Facebook
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41 Comments

  • Lindsay says:

    I love this so much because it’s all so true!! Love supporting other women!!

  • Nessy says:

    Being a mother is beautiful despite the mess. Seriously, sometimes I really wonder how IG moms could take great photos of their kids with a very clean and pristine background. I guess the key really is to just enjoy every moment and accept the fact that not everything is picture perfect- only your love for your child is.

  • Tamalyn says:

    You know when I see a child having tantrums at a restaurant or grocery store, I feel at one with the mama! Cause I know exactly how she feels – I always want to jump over and help out. I remember one time when my kids did this (they still sometimes do and they are 6 & 8!!), an elderly lady came over (I thought she was going to say how loud my kids were) and she told me to love these moments as it will pass by too quickly and that my kids were darling. I almost cried! Hope you have a great day today!!!

    • Katie-Lou says:

      I always give the struggling mamma a smile or simply let her know its OK. we’ve all been there – Its hard work.

      Thank you – I hope you have a fabulous week 🙂

  • Renata Feyen says:

    Yes sure being a mom has it’s high and lows – and it can be hard at times – but I would do it all over again knowing what I know now 🙂

  • Cris says:

    Wonderful article! Supporting each other is always so important!

  • Tamalyn Lee says:

    And many times that smile would mean the world! You too!! 😁

  • Ally says:

    This is such a great post. Parenthood truly can be very hard and messy. I try not to compare myself to the supermoms out there who make everything look so easy.

  • Melissa says:

    I love being a mama! Nothing like it in the world. No one is perfect and everyone has good days and bad, but we all should understand each other since most likely we have been there with our own kids.

  • Joan Cajic says:

    Loving this and the support, we should be uplifting each other like this and not putting each other down.

  • Amber Myers says:

    Yes, being a parent is TOUGH. I prefer it when people share the truth about it. I hate when people just show the “perfect” moments. It’s better to be honest!

  • Tara Pittman says:

    Parenthood is a tough job and having other parent friends is always good. It does get better when the kids go to school.

  • What a great and supportive post! I’m not a mom, but it amazes me how much support moms get from one another. I know it is necessary because it even LOOKS necessary, from the outside! 🙂 Kudos to all of you! <3

  • Gemille Sleweon says:

    I’m not a mother yet, but i do look up to all the mothers that i am surrounded with. It’s so important for women to support each other and have each other to lean on. great post.

  • kumamonjeng says:

    Being a women is not easy and being a mother is even harder. A job we can’t call it quit! But then when we look back it is worth it and fulfilling.

  • Mommy Sigrid says:

    Thank you for sharing this. I also intend to write a post about how messy our house can be and how difficult the kids sometimes get. Life is not always picture perfect. But we try to survive. After all, they won’t be kids for long.

  • Yes and it never changes, my kids are 12 and 28 and it is still a struggle, being a mom is very hard.

  • Emma Riley says:

    Wow, this is such a great post and I do love reading this. I am a mom of two and I agree that there’s a lot of ups and downs and messy things in being a mother but I actually love it most especially when you hear them laugh, when they give a hug and kisses and when they say I love you Mom!

  • Adessa Young says:

    This is such a lovely post and truly empowering for mother’s like me. Mother needs a real support system since not all of us are super mom. Thank you so much for sharing this!

  • prabashi says:

    on point. i completely agree with you. We need stop looking down at mothers and support each other than talking what they did wrong.

  • Cassie says:

    Way to lay it all out there! So many truths

  • I love reading this! Today, there are people who like to judge by the way our house looks like. They forget to see the happiness inside the messy house.

  • Nina says:

    I love and appreciate the honesty. I am not yet a mother but I am looking forward to be one someday. As I’ve gathered watching friends have kids, it is an amazing role but I really do not agree with judging. I feel that people are quick to judge the mothers when kids are not behaving. I really don’t like that. Some kids are just “handful” and others were born angels and everyone raising a little “devil” or an “angel” deserves respect and support. Nonetheless these kids are our future.

  • Flyingkids says:

    This is a very inspirational and motivational read. The concept of supporting and empowering women is plausible.

  • Becca Wilson says:

    Women supporting other women in this thing called life and parenthood is so important. If we all lifted each other up a little more I think it would be so much better!

  • Being a woman and a parent is full of trials and errors , it feels great to have found some support from your blog !

  • I am not a parent yet but having seen my parents do it and reading blogs about it, i can only believe you. Parenting is hard and messy and full of trials and errors.

  • Princess Quinn says:

    A lot of mothers who are in need of motivation and extra inspiration could relate to this. Who says parenthood is easy right? This is such an uplifting post.

  • jeannine says:

    Oh my word, I just do my best. Try little harder every day, but only my best, besides my kids tell my me that I am perfect every day

  • Erin Sluka says:

    We are very hard on ourselves and compete especially as women.

  • Meagan Badore says:

    This is a great post for moms to read. In a world where people easily judge each other through real life and social media, moms need to support one another because being a mom is the hardest job a woman can have.

  • The reality of motherhood is that it is no easy at all. And more so, it becomes even harder when one never prepared well before getting into motherhood. But there is no need to worry. A strong mom can also be vulnerable…so can a strong parent…we understand,right?

  • Sara Welch says:

    I love seeing women around me being strong and taking charge. It is contagious.

  • I was just thinking about writing a blog post on this the other day. I love this! Women should definitely empower women.

  • Suzanne Melton says:

    Such a wonderful and inspiring post. Thank you for this wonderful read.

  • Danielle says:

    I always like to show the reality of parenthood otherwise everyone is going to get a serious shock when it happens haha

  • Danielle says:

    Yes I love this! Woman Empowering other women is the best thing you could ever wish for!!!

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